From Gramps

Today, an army captain mopped our dining room floor -- on his knees, with paper towels! Such a scenario may never present itself anywhere in or near our domicile again. We look upon it in awe and wonderment -- and with some embarrassment. The fact is that we had failed to lock properly our expandable dining room table and, having asked Joe to pull it back to its pre-dinner position, watched in stunned, actionless amazement, as the table parted in the middle and spilled a substantial amount of the after-dinner food, drink and table ware onto the floor. It was not Joe's fault; however, as an officer and gentleman graduate of the school of the long, gray line, he went immediately to his knees for the mopping up. We salute you, Captain Joe. We hope to have you and yours here again for dinner some time before you are advanced in rank and we risk the possibility of having an army major mopping our floors.